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Shopaholic on her own

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[12 May 2009|11:45pm]
spent two days in wildwood.
took another 20 out of the bank.
14 dollars on gas.
to me, thats not too bad.
swing from the power lines

[10 May 2009|11:47pm]
The total expenses for today:


the total of food that i bought at Giant was 44.42. and i got 20 dollars cash back so i can be more watchful with my fast food purchases for the week.

two small trips to McDonalds and that was it.
roughly 14.00 left of that cash.

tomorrow im returning the dress. :) and hopefully not spending any more money. i wont even let myself go in any store.
swing from the power lines

[09 May 2009|11:57pm]
I did go to Dunkin donuts, wawa twice, and the limited today.
but that was before i started officially tracking.

Orange Julius (before work) - 4.23
Taco Bell (during Work)- 2.43

Daily Totals: 6.66

Tomorrow to KOP to return my perfect dress.
swing from the power lines

[09 May 2009|03:28pm]
This journal has been revamped to be my new official side-kick to helping me curb my spending habits.

The first order of business: tomorrow morning I will go to King of Prussia mall and return the 70 dollar dress I bought at the Limited. If I save during the summer, I can spend money at the end of the summer for back to college clothes.

I am also applying for a new job so that I can make more money.

Dinner tonight at Taco bell will be 4 dollars.

Then on Wednesday I will get my Car washed.

I can't spend more than 20 dollars on food until Thursday. Starting tonight.
swing from the power lines

[07 May 2009|08:29pm]
ive only been alone for a few hours but i think i've dipped into a chronic depression
1 skipping record|swing from the power lines

[18 Apr 2009|01:29am]
Dear Diary,

Somebody save me.
swing from the power lines

[05 Apr 2009|08:16pm]
I hate the feeling that i've lost all my innocence. When i look at old pictures of myself, even from a year ago, i feel like i don't know the girl in them.

where did she go?
1 skipping record|swing from the power lines

oh baby when they made me, they broke the mold [01 Apr 2009|09:33am]
well, i figured id finally update.
i'm sorry that i'm prolly the worst LJ friend in the history of life. :/
even though i havent been commenting on all your recent entries, i'm here. i'm reading them.
well. im in a great mood today even though i have no real reason to be. im unprepared for all three classes that ihave today.
and i only have three because i didnt feel like getting out of bed soon enough to make it to my first class at 8:45.
it's my world civ class. which prolly makes me the worst history major ever for deliberately skipping one of the easiest classes this university offers.
not only am i unprepared for classes, but this breakfast im eating sucks. i made myself a great coffee in the caf, but i have kelloggs smart start in my backpack and im about to run over to the cafe in the class hall to pick up a brown sugar cinnamon before my social psych class. and maybe a grape soda because i love it.
i teach my very first REAL lesson in front of an actual high school class tomorrow.
im also not prepared for that.
as excited as i am for it, i feel like theyre going to attack me if i dont know the answer to a question. especially becaseu ive had two weeks to prepare for it.
its a lesson on mesoamerica with a focus on the hohokam and anasazi tribes. and its a freshmen class. predominantly black.
yeah, im going to get eaten alive.
im excited for the lesson that i have planned. the class reads from the text everyday so im going to not use the text at all.
im going to do a warmup activity, a group activity and a video! and only use a ten minute short fact lecture.
but yeah, i've barely read the information i need to so that i can actually talk about the hohokam tribes, and ive barely figured out what parts of the movie i want to show. plus i need to call the teacher today and make sure she knows to have the DVD player in the classroom or else im really fucked.

ew. some fucking girl just sat down next to me in the library (who kinda looks like a dude) and fucking moves my backpack without asking because she feels the needs to open up two seperate laptops in addition to the computer she is sitting out. ugh i wanna be like get the fuck out.

erik comes home from iraq in about two months. i have the feeling that we will be dating when he comes back. we talk everyday.

well. im sorry again for being the worst lj friend.
2 skipping records|swing from the power lines

[11 Mar 2009|12:21am]
i'm sorry i've been gone for so long.
can anybody hear me?
2 skipping records|swing from the power lines

[31 Dec 2008|08:38pm]
 im alone on new years.
just like my birthday, christmas, thanksgiving.
fuck everyone.
and no, my parents being home doesnt count.- im still alone.

2 skipping records|swing from the power lines

[19 Oct 2008|11:19pm]
i swear ill try to comment on all your entries. but its been hard lately.
i dont even know if its worth it to write.

i feel like nothing i ever do will ever be worth it.
everything has been so hard.
i've decided to see a therapist instead of a psychiatrist.
4 skipping records|swing from the power lines

can someone please start making sense? and beg the lord for accidents. [23 Aug 2008|07:45pm]
 well, after two long days of driving from south florida to Immaculata in Pennsylvania....im home.
i am back at school and pumped for it to start. i already have my job! i got transferred to an Express in a mall five minutes from my dorm.
i love it.
its a bit slow here because upper classmen havent moved back yet. (i moved in early bc i had a two day drive and didnt want to do it during the weekend.) but they move back tomorrow...
and tomorrow i have the second first day of my job :) this store is at a different level then my last one so i have to learn how theyre different and all that stuff
but i work 7 hours tomorrow.
and of course, my biggest question is....what am i going to wear?!?!
everything else has been going ok...if you count my mom and i fighting a lot during the trip and me telling her i wont call her til thanksgiving and her telling me that i make her cry herself to sleep every night.
yeah real mother daughter bonding. :-/
my mom offered for me to find a therapist that she will pay for....im considering.
well there is not much else going on except that im still trying to keep positive as i start my sophomore year.
2 skipping records|swing from the power lines

[29 May 2008|12:38am]
 ryan and i broke up for like a few days.
but then i changed how high maintenance i was so i wouldnt lose him and he said if i kept acting like that, then there would be no reason to stay on a break.which made me happy.
so we are back together and so wonderful and happy.
i really want to see him but i think we are doing really well.
we dont talk or text as much but its really helping me to be not so high maintenace and ive realized i dont want a guy who demands 24/7 attention. 
i mean, i see my friends and i see how their bf's ask a million questions at what they do and ryan is just like "i dont give a fuck"
i love him. hes perfect.
sandi is here for the week.
and tomorrow night, thursday night (so tech tonight) me, sandi and my mom are seeing sex and the city the movie at the midnight viewing. eep i cant wait! ive waited so long for this!!!
1 skipping record|swing from the power lines

hold on theres a hole in my heart everyone can see right through me [20 May 2008|11:51am]
[ mood | content ]

:) im happy
cept for the fact that im alone cuz baby is like 8 states away. :(
everything is good.
i got a job!
im working for express now in the boca town center mall
ive ben doing orientation.
yesterday i worked 12-230
and today i work from 6-8 
theyre all short shifts because its orientation. todays module is tyring clothes on! :)
i get a legit schedule in the coming weeks.
i love working there i can wear cute shorts and tops and stuff :)
so yeah, thats it. 

1 skipping record|swing from the power lines

ugh [15 May 2008|11:40am]
well, im in Florida now.
sandi comes to visit in a week and a half.
im looking real hard for a job. 
phil is calling me a whore.
i hang out down here with steve.
we smoke and walk on the beach a lot.
sex and the city movie comes out and i CANT WAIT to see it. mom and i are going with sandi to see it. mom and i book our tickets for it soon.
its beautiful down here.
i miss ryan a lot.
though i like hardly ever hear from him.

thats it. more to come. 
swing from the power lines

she's got her halo and wings hidden under his eyes, but she's an angel for sure [05 May 2008|10:41am]
[ mood | cheerful ]

ok so i totally just aced my math exam that i just took. hopefully. i already have a 111% in that class, and i get an extra 20 points for going to class the otehr day so i should be getting an A in that class :)
i got a 96% on my italian oral exam last wednesday. today i need to do my theology project and read a chapter for my behavioral statistics exam.
ugh that exam is going to kill me.
im in the process of packing and cleaning my room because half of my stuff in colege goes into storage for the summer.
the rest (aka my computer, TV, DVD player and obnoxiously huge wardrobe) go into my car and me and my dad drive down to FL from pennsylvania on wed morning after my biology exam.
welcome to the drive from hell. i just hope that we will be making good time. my goal is to be near baltimore by noon and then in north caroline by 5 then south carolina before 11 pm.
i hope that it seems likely. 
well, i gotta go. im in the library now and i have to go do my hours for april to hand into my boss today before she sends me an email complaining that she hasnt gotten them yet.
and i need to stop by my old roomates room to grab some things i lent her in the beginning of the year like hooks and bulletin boards.
lots of work to do today!!!
ps- me and ryan are doing really well....and i leave in two days :(

1 skipping record|swing from the power lines

i know we're not like them, couldnt be if we tried. Life on life's terms aint easy [28 Apr 2008|10:49am]
the song Life on Life's Terms by Bedlight For Blue Eyes is stuck in my head.
i know sophia will appreciate that.

So I am in the library right now, working on my research paper that is due tomorrow.
i already made my two appointments to go to the writing center this afternoon at 530 and 730.
usually i wouldnt go but we are not allowed to hand in a paper before we go. :/
i email my teacher like every  hour for her to proofread certain parts of my paper. she is helping me so much. but what is the point of going to the writing center if she alraedy is reading like every rough copy that i have? idk i guess i should atleast get a B on this paper. its like ten freaking pages. but i think that i will be able to make due with seven, which is the minimum requirement. 

so with this paper, and the fact that my italian oral exam is on wednesday along with my italian written final exam is on friday, and that fact that i need to memorize 4 bio tests for my exam NEXT wed and study for my theology final and work on my theology final exam presentation AND i have a fundamentals and statistics on the SAME day a week from today basically means that i will be living in the library for the rest of my life....or atleast until i leave next wednesday morning with mt daddy.

the cheerleading squad went to wildwood. we had so much fun. two nights, one day at the pier, it was so much fun. i love those girls. and i got a spot on the squad again for next year. YAY! i knew id make it, my jumps are pretty awesome and i have killer stunting experience.
ill put wildwood pics up maybe tomorrow? if i have time.

ryan said he didnt know what he wanted when i asked him if he still wanted to be with me.
it really threw me off and made me sad. he said i take this relationship a lot more seriously then he does, so its not fair to me. i dont get it.
i think i got him at a week moment though because then last night he was  all over me and kissing me and telling me he loved me and could not keep touching me and rubbing my back and stuff.
i just want us to enjoy what we have now.
he said the minute he gets money this summer he will book his plane ticket so hopefully i will see him in the middle of june which would be AWESOME! ill miss him :) hes so wonderful and makes me so happy.
and yesterday was our one month. which neither of us noticed, but im about to leave the library to go wake him up so i think ill tell him then :)

im actually in a really good mood despite this paper because right now im sitting at my favorite spot in the entire library.
it looks out over all of valley forge. its so beautiful. but it fucking is cloudy as shit right now which blows. i thought the weather was supposed to get nicer? 

love you all.
swing from the power lines

right off the edge she'll walk [24 Apr 2008|10:20pm]
im going to Costa Rica for spring break of 09
its not definitely official but my mom and dad said that they will let me go and will give me the 95 dollar deposit.
its an enviromental expedition to costa rica hosted by the school.
fifteen people.
this is the awesome shit ill be doing:

zipline through the jungle.
see giant crocadiles.
watch nesting sea turtles
re-nest turtles
clean up pacific coast beaches
visit tribes
see one of the worlds most active volcanoes.
butterfly farms
rain forests
white water rafting
help with reforestation
help out with the scarlet macaw project

HOW AWESOME IS THIS?!?! i emailed the nun who is running it. and she said there is still room in the program.
she also said shed love  me to go cuz she knows me and that its def a once in a lifetime oppurtunity.
and im siezing it!

what you think?
3 skipping records|swing from the power lines

the sadie hawkins dance in my khaki pants [23 Apr 2008|01:44pm]
[ mood | aggravated ]

so im in a really pissed off mood. its private because even though ryan doesnt read this anymore there is always that chance.
so usually me and ryan hang out in the quad. the quad is chad and moser's room.
the other people are dinneen, pep, moo and tyrell. (they all go by their last names cept chad)
well, me and chad get along because im hooking him up with my best friend sophia.
pep likes me because i smoke with him and hes a nice guy overall.
moser doesnt hate anyone.
tyrell likes me cause i met him in the summer and hes chiil and thinks im chill and we have taken all the same bio this entire year.
BUT dinneen and moo fucking hate me and give ryan so much shit about me.
dinneen has been being an immature asshole to everyone. he barely speaks and like commands that no one sits where he wants to sit and that no one can talk if he is watching tv in the quad. ITS NOT EVEN HIS ROOM.
but i barely saw ryan at all yesterday and i didnt see him at all today until a late lunch. and i barely saw him sunday or monday.
im not complaining, but basically for the amount of time we usually spend with each other, we really havnt been spending the past few days together AT ALL.
SOoooo last night before i went to cheer tryouts, i stopped by the quad to see him. he was watching the flyers game with moo and dinneen and tyrell.
so i gave him a couple kisses on the cheek and was playing with his hair. i wasnt talking to him at all, i was just watching the game. the last five minutes before i left i ended up in his lap(where he usually puts me) and just stoked his knee or something like that.
i knew i wasnt sleeping with him that night (cuz i slept in sponge curlers) so i slipped my tongue in his mouth for HALF A SECOND as i left. cuz i knew i was not going to have the chance to give him my usual amazing good night kiss.
well, today, being the good friend that he is, chad came up to me during lunch when i was eating with holly, pep and tyrell.
he told me that i needed to ease up on making out with ryan because dinneen and moo were bitching. he said he personally didnt care and wasnt there, but he bet that they were blowing it out of proportion.
i told him that i was fucking done with hanging out in the quad and now i avoid dinneen like the plague because im so tired of his bullshit.
chad agreed with  me competely and pep didnt say anything. i like how he stays out of other peoples affairs even if dinneen and pep are room mates.
tyrell said he saw my point.

well, when i talked to ryan, he agrred with them.he told me how much he hated PDAs. OMG IT WAS A HALF SECOND KISS! OMG grow up! you couldnt even tell that there was any tongue at all. so now im just pissy about it.
and fuck going to the quad.

ok so  i just had to vent.
do i have a right to be pissy about this whole situation?

2 skipping records|swing from the power lines

so maybe i do, but that shouldnt affect your life anymore.and ill let you get the best of me [20 Apr 2008|07:16pm]
[ mood | tired ]

so i dont want to update on everything.
but yesterday ryan broke up with me. i dont know why.
he said we had too diferent personalities. but now we're back together?
i dont get it. but it hurt so bad so im just happy its ok now. i guess he had a weak moment?
i hate it. its so fucked up. and i still hate him for it. but w/e
ill just update with random pics from this semester cuz im bored.

my hair looks awful in this pic, but w/e this is me and my sister (yeah i know shes gorjis) at my nana's funeral

me and ryan in baltimore (btw these pics are not in chronological order) ps im sitting in this pic, not squatting

my weekend with my best friend sarah bear

idk if i like the way i look in this pic or not. its me and sarah bear

me and my friend katie from cheerleadingi love this pic

thats it! break my heart, im getting worried!
ps- cheerleading evals are tonight and im soooo tired. we wont be done til ten and idk if i can make it! plus i have bio hw to do.

7 skipping records|swing from the power lines

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